Monday, April 23, 2007

Take Responsibility - Stop Saying "you"

Okay, today's post is a rant. Have you ever noticed that people constantly use the pronoun "you" when referring to events that they experienced themselves? Why don't people take responsibility for themselves?

Here are a few examples:

Example #1
When asked: "What was so good about that movie?" a person responds: Well you can really get into it. You sit there watching it and you feel the emotion of the score and then you get all teary eyed and you...

Do you see what I mean? I didn't "really get into it." I didn't sit there and I didn't feel the emotion... YOU did, so say it!

A better response would have been: Well I can really get into it. I sat there watching it and I felt the emotion of the score and then I got all teary eyed and I...

Example #2
When you're in a position like mine, you have to really try hard to do your best. If you don't, then the boss will catch you not doing your job and you'll be fired.

How about you take responsibility for yourself. Try this instead:

When in a position like mine, I have to really try hard to do my best. If I don't, then my boss will catch me not doing my job and I'll be fired.

Example #3
I like to play the guitar because you learn how to read music, and you can play songs from the bands you like and then you might be able to start your own band.

Try this instead:

I like to play the guitar because I learn how to read music, and I can play songs from the bands I like and then I might be able to start my own band.

So take my advice: take responsibility for yourself. Don't say "you," say "I."

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey! Your back!

Here's a contrary opinion. The using of the word "you" doesn't bother me, because it's actually replacing a verb tense that is not available in the English language. I forget what it's called in Spanish, but it's essentially the indirect global. Perhaps a better word than You or I would be One

When one is in a position like mine, one has to really try hard to do one's best. If one doesn't, then one will be caught by one's boss, and one will be fired.

It doesn't flow as easily, as You or I, but the tense is actually correct.

Jay said...

I agree. If one were to use "one" in place of "you" then it would be acceptable. My point is that saying "you" is actually incorrect.

I just hate it when people are telling ME what I did and what I felt, etc.

:)

chipandsalsa said...

Ok, ok, here is the next view point that "I" appreciate and "I" feel "one" or "you" would enjoy. Try this:

While driving, Rich is the shiz! Rich drives like a professional Nascar Driver. Rich knows his way around the road and really gets the job done! Rich? Well, Rich knows - Rich is the man!

3rd person always makes me, or Rich means, Rich laugh! What do you think Bob Dole?

Unknown said...

Using "I" instead of "You" personalizes what the person is saying and causes them to take responsibility not only for their thoughts but for their emotions as well.

Some people want to distance themselves from responsibility (for bad behavior) or they attempt to keep their feelings at a distance when they use "You" instead of "I." It is a defence mechanism, but one that if changed could make everyone's world much more honest and real.